A few weeks ago Jeff asked “What does it mean to be happy?” Today I’d like to ask a related question – what makes us happy? – and find an answer in an unusual source.

Seventy-five years ago, in 1938, a group of scientists at Harvard University began a study of more than 250 young men. The goal of the study, called the Grant Study, was to try to discover what factors (something that causes or influences a situation) contribute to (help make something happen), or keep people from, becoming and enjoying life as healthy adults.

The study continues today even though many of the men have died and those who are still alive are in their late 80s or early 90s. For all those years, these men have had regular medical examinations, taken psychological tests, filled out questionnaires, and sat for interviews. The Grant Study is one of the longest-running and most complete studies of mental and physical health in history.

Last year, Dr. George Vaillant, who directed the study for more than 40 years, wrote a book called Triumphs of Experience. In it he documents (reports) what it is like to flourish (do well) later in life.

According to Vaillant, relationships matter the most (are the most important). There is a strong correlation (connection) between the quality of all your relationships and your health and happiness as you get older. This is especially true of your relationships with your parents. The warmth (affection, kindness, love) of your relationship with your mother matters well into adulthood and affects many areas of life. And the warmth of your relationship with your father becomes more important as you grow older. For example, a warm relationship with your father helps reduce anxiety (the feeling of being worried) and contributes to increased satisfaction with life even when you’re 75 years old.

Vaillant reports that the habits we develop before we’re 50 and how we respond, or react, to the experiences we have as we mature (become adults) help determine our success and satisfaction as we grow older. Some of the greatest triumphs (victories or achievements) in the study were enjoyed by people who experienced the greatest difficulties. What we do when we face (experience) pain, conflict, or uncertainty, says Valliant, is more important than avoiding them. In the study, those who responded positively and creatively to life’s difficulties were able to turn those difficulties into triumphs.

The most destructive (damaging) factor uncovered in the study was excessive (too much) drinking. It was the main cause of divorce, contributed to depression and mental problems, and, along with cigarette smoking, often led to early death.

Now, what about happiness? The study doesn’t define happiness, but it’s easy to infer (form an opinion from available information) a meaning of pleasure, satisfaction, or contentment. The study reveals a strong connection between the warmth of your relationships and health and happiness as you grow older. When asked what he had learned from the Grant Study, Vaillant replied that “the only thing that matters in life are your relationships to other people … Happiness is love.”

~ Warren Ediger – English tutor/coach and creator of the Successful English web site.

Photo by SalFalko used under Creative Commons license.

Every city has people selling things on the street. After all, where can you find more foot traffic (people walking by) than on a city’s sidewalks?

New York City would be a very different place if it didn’t have its many street vendors selling food and other products. Street vendors can sell just about anything, including food — both cooked and uncooked, such as vegetables and fruit — and non-edible items, such as jewelry, luggage, paintings, clothes, cell phone accessories (items used to make something even better, or easier to use), and more.

To be a legitimate (real; following the rules or the law) street vendor in the U.S., you’ll need to follow the laws and regulations, which differ (are different) for each city or state. However, you normally need at least three things.

1.  A sales tax permit and tax certificate — These give you permission from the government to collect tax each time you sell something, so that you can then give that tax money to the government.

2. A general business license — All businesses need a business license that allows the business owner to do business.

3. A vendor license — This is a special license in addition to a business license that allows you to operate on the street.

These are the things you should have if you’re a street vendor in the U.S., but many street vendors in big cities set up shop (operate a business) illegally (without following the law). In most cases (normally), the police turns a blind eye (ignores them) unless there are complaints and problems. That’s exactly what’s happening on one popular street in a neighborhood in Los Angeles called Watts.

In Watts, there is a street known for street vendors called Beach Street. The licensed businesses on the street, people with stores along the street, are complaining (saying that they don’t like it) that vendors are taking away their customers. The city is complaining that they’re losing sale tax money. Now, officials are considering stricter (greater demand that a law or rule be followed) rules for street vendors.

Are there many street vendors where you live? Are there laws and regulations for street vendors? Do you think they’re a blessing (good thing) or a curse (bad thing) for your community?

~ Lucy

Photo Credit: Frankfurter stand from Wikipedia

________

A note about the “Podcasts This Week” poll

Thank you to those of you who voted and/or commented on our April 25th “Podcast This Week” poll. The results show a preference to keep the Monday posts, with about 46% voting to keep them and 28% voting to get rid of them. We will, therefore, continue to post the “Podcast This Week” messages each week.

We really appreciate you voicing your opinions and helping us make the ESL Podcast blog the most useful it can be!

When you are invited to someone’s house, let’s say for dinner, is it the custom (common practice) in your country to take a gift?

In the U.S. it’s considered the polite thing to do. They’re called host or hostess gifts – the people who receive or entertain guests are called the host or hostess. Giving a hostess gift is a nice way to say thank you for someone’s hospitality (friendly behavior toward guests) or to show how much you appreciate them. Wine is a popular choice, as is a box of chocolates or bag of gourmet (very good) coffee.

But what would you take if your host was the President of the United States? What would you take if you were the head of your country or a state or business leader?

That question is asked and answered about 15,000 times each year. According to the National Archives, the government organization that takes care of historical records, that’s how many gifts the president receives each year on behalf of (as a representative of) the United States. The gifts come from almost every state in the U.S. and every country in the world.

When world leaders visit each other, it’s common for them to exchange (give each other) gifts. It’s a tradition that’s been practiced for many centuries (hundreds of years) and is considered a part of good diplomacy (the management of relationships between countries).

When U.S. government employees receive gifts from a foreign government or organization, they must declare (report) them. And they can’t keep them unless they are worth less than $100. Gifts given to the president or his family are turned over to (put in the care of) the National Archives. Later, many of the gifts will be displayed at the presidential library, which is built after the president leaves the White House.

The declaration includes the name of the country that gave the gift, a description of the gift, an estimate of its value, and the reason for accepting the gift. Often the reason is that not accepting it “would cause embarrassment to the donor and the U.S. government”; in other words, it would make them uncomfortable.

Last week the government released the list of all the gifts the president accepted in 2011. It’s very interesting reading! Here are a few highlights (important or interesting parts):

Former French president Sarkozy gave President Obama a golf bag and a Baccarat crystal (glass) statuette (small statue) of a group of golfers. The Sarkozys gave the Obamas a total of 16 gifts, the most received from one country.

German chancellor Merkel’s gifts included a golf putter (club used to hit the golf ball into the cup) and some golf training (practice) equipment.

British prime minister Cameron and his wife gave the Obamas a rug, a silver bracelet for their girls, and a table tennis table.

Leaders from three countries gave the president works of art. Former Chinese president Hu Jintao gave President Obama a 48-inch-tall (1.2 m) bronze (a reddish brown metal) statue of Abraham Lincoln created by a well-known Chinese artist. Sergio Cabral, governor of the state of Rio de Janeiro, gave the president a photograph by artist Vik Muniz, which is now being shown in a museum. And President Ondimba of Gabon, a tiny west African country, gave President Obama a glass statue by Daum, a well-known French crystal (glass) studio (art shop).

The president did keep one gift.  It was a copy of the book Ghengis Khan and the Making of the Modern World, which was given to Mr. Obama by Mongolian president Elbegdorj.

* carrying

~ Warren Ediger – English language coach/tutor and creator of the Successful English web site.

Photo used under Creative Common license.

A man or a woman asks you out on a date. You have coffee, lunch, or dinner together. You find out more about each other. You fall in love and you live happily ever after (forever), right?

Well, things aren’t quite that simple. According to a recent Glamour magazine article about a survey (piece of research; questionnaire) conducted by Match.com, a popular Internet dating website, people are using “pre-dating” to help them decide whether to give someone a chance or not. “Pre-dating” is the use of the Internet and social media websites to find out information about a potential (possible) date.

According to the Match.com survey, about 50% of women research a man on Facebook before a date. Others look at LinkedIn, a social media site for people making professional contacts, Twitter, or blogs. The survey included about 5,500 singles (unmarried or uncommitted men and women).

Among the things they search for are ex-boyfriends and girlfriends, what they do for a living (job or career), playlists (selection of favorite songs that can be played one after another), and any other information that would give singles an idea of who they may be dating.

According to the same survey, a surprising 49% of women had cancelled a first date because of something they found out (discovered; learned) about that person online. That’s actually not too surprising, since another study mentioned in the article found that when we find out one thing we object to (don’t like) about a person, we tend to judge them very harshly (strictly; believing something is worse than it really is), even if we’re compatible (have similar ideas or interests) in other areas and like and respect that person for other things.  The author of the study points out that disillusionment (finding out that something is not as good as we once believed) may take hours if we talk to the person, but can happen instantly (immediately; without delay) when we see that information online.

If you’re single, do you do “pre-dating”? Have you decided to date or not to date someone strictly (only) based on what you’ve found out?

Looking at it more generally, have you ever not associated with or not been friends with someone because of something you found out about them online? Has online information ever affected your decision to hire or work with someone?

~ Lucy

Photo Credit: Couple 01 from Wikipedia