The U.S. Government: CLOSED

800px-United_States_Capitol_-_west_frontAs you may have heard, the United States government has shut down (stopped working) because the Democrats and Republicans are in a standoff (where neither side will compromise or give up what it wants). Federal (national) government and many military (related to a country’s security) offices and services are unavailable, national parks such as Yellowstone and Yosemite are closed, and federal workers are being furloughed (temporarily told to stay home from work).

At the heart of the matter (the main point or problem) is the new healthcare program passed in 2010 called the Affordable Care Act — often referred to as “Obamacare” — which offers people the chance to purchase health insurance who don’t have or can’t get health insurance in another way. The Republicans don’t like Obamacare and propose delaying its implementation (the putting of a plan into action) for a year. The Democrats say no. In fact, the Affordable Care Act went into effect (started working) this week, on October 1. Since the two sides are in a standoff, they cannot agree on a budget (spending plan) for the government and that’s the reason for the shutdown.

While politicians are battling it all out (fighting), some people have taken to (used as a way of communicating) Twitter with a little humor about this crazy situation. They’ve come up with some pickup lines (things you say to someone you’ve never met before to try to get him or her interested in you romantically).

Pickup lines are usually cheesy (with little value and considered of poor taste or unpleasant) and usually aren’t very effective, and these are no different. I’ll explain a couple that appeared in an NPR article, but some of them are just a little too risqué (with too much sexual content) for our blog. You can try figuring those out for yourself, if you want to.

“You’re all the stimulus I need.”
An economic stimulus is when the government does something to try to improve the economy, such as spending money on new projects to create jobs or cutting (lowering) interest rates (how much money you’ll earn by keeping your money in the bank) so people will spend more money instead of saving it. “Stimulus” is also something that causes someone to feel more energy or excitement. I don’t think I need to tell you what kind of excitement we are talking about here.

“Where have you been sequestered all my life?”
Sequester can mean to hide something somewhere so others can’t find it or use it, but it can also mean to take assets (money or things worth money) from people until they pay their debt (money they owe someone else). Earlier this year, “budget sequestering” became a common term in American politics. Once again, the Democrats and Republicans were arguing about money. Budget sequestering means that if the Democrats and Republicans cannot agree on a budget, automatic spending cuts (reductions) in government spending occur as planned according to an earlier budget deal (compromise; plan). The Republicans wanted this to happen so that the government would be forced to cut spending, while the Democrats argued that cuts would eliminate (remove) or reduce (make less or smaller) important services to Americans and be bad for the economy. After a two month delay, the budget sequestration went into effect (occurred).

This pickup line is a play on (refers to in a amusing way to) the pickup line, “Where have you been hiding all my life?” meaning, I suppose, “I’m glad I’ve finally found you.”

If you’re trying to pick up an American girl (or guy), you could try these pickup lines, but I wouldn’t hold out much hope (wouldn’t expect success). These are some of the worst — though funny — pickup lines I’ve ever heard.

– Lucy

Photo Credit: United States Capitol – West Front

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9 Responses to The U.S. Government: CLOSED

  1. Aécio Flávio Perim says:

    I am sorry about this problem in the most powerful nation in world. But something tells me that American people chose this situation when they gave a ballot of confidence to Obama, since the first time he was elected. It seemed to be the solution of all problems as the joy people felt. Of course, those who are out of the American land see one thing and those who are inside see another thing. However, it is better to wait to see what is going to happen in a near future. Personally, I want this argue get over soon.
    Aecio from Brazil, the land with political problems too.

  2. emiliano says:

    Sorry Lucy, but all these pickup similitudes seems to me absolutely stupid and with lack of any imagination, what a lot stupid phrases to say to a girl or
    a lady you want to please. Just incredible to a Mediterranean mind like me or another countries from the south of Europe or America.

    Thank you to inform us about new phrases and expressions despite they are so sllly like these one.
    Yes, to say “Where have you been sequestered all my life?” or “You’re all the stimulus I need.” to date a girl or a nice woman it is like crazy and lack
    of enthusiasm about what love attraction means.

    Please, more imagination and feelings it ls like absurd to compare love affairs with economy, even more absurd with Goverment´s quarrels.

    Again sorry Lucy but this is my point of view.


    Talking about economy, till what amount of thousand millions of debt are going to be the United States, Spain, France or which ever
    other country?. Where are the limit?.
    I don´t really know, but it seem like a big snow ball that goes bigger every moth or year till the gross no body knows.

    When the great snowball melts everything stay flooded without remedy for years and years.
    I hope not to be here by then.

    Thanks Lucy.


  3. Dan says:

    Hey Lucy

    I do not know about L.A., but over here, it is beautiful because you can see the four season in all their beauty.

    Right now the woods around are turning from green to brown and the leaves are falling down.

    You can smell in the air the Autumn/Fall. The Crows and Magpies are back. I do not know why, during the summer they disappear.

    As usual I am tossing at them a few biscuits a day. And they even appreciate that with loud CRA CRA.

    Of course I have heard about the shut down, it is impossible not to, seeing the vast coverage it had/has on EVERY single news outlets out there.

    We had a similar situation over here in Italy too.

    It is funny because if you listen to the Republicans they say it is the Democrats fault, and the Democrats put the blame on the Republicans.
    Everyone says ” we want to sit down and discuss this they do not”

    Hey Lucy, could you please make some clarity for us? ahahah I know that is not easy, and I do not want to make you feel uncomfortable.
    Moreover, we could guess which party Lucy votes for, if she does.

    About those pickup lines, those are terrible/lame/embarrassing/painful/pathetic.

    Thank you Lucy

  4. Dan says:

    Me again,

    In Italian, if you say someone “You’re all the stimulus I need.” that means that I could not go to the bathroom for several days, and you are the, say, trigger for my going.
    You are provoking me to go. Sorry, but this is worse than the other meaning.

    Thank you

  5. Dan says:

    Me again.

    Sorry, but I just leaned the right term for describing what I was trying to say in my previous comment.

    They are playing the blame game. see, short, nice and simple. I have to remember this one. “The blame game”


  6. Lassana says:

    Hi Everyone,

    I’m very surprised about this situation. I don’t figure out how a country such as the US, is going to the shutdown.

    People gives their confidence to politicians, it’s unfair to see the manner whom politicians makes the politic. Normally, their job is to ensure security and create economic conditions to people in order that they can find a job and get healthcare.

    Personally, I think that Obama’s bill about universal healthcare is FAIR ! because I think poor people have the right to get healthcare and especially because they are poor.

    I also think this currently situation is the fault of republicans and the reason is they did not want that the healthcare law passes, therefore they reject government budget. It’s amazing to see that, they only think to their own interest, then that they should be at the service of US citizens.

    I live in France and what I can say is that our healthcare system based on the universal principe is very, very good for all French people!

    I’m sure that in one or two years later, all US citizens will be proud of their healthcare system. They’ll say that the shutdown in 2013 was a very big mistake!

    see you soon.


  7. Myo ko ko says:

    Lucy, reading your post, I don’t really know what to say.
    Here Obama laid out this Obamacare plan trying to help those who can’t have a health
    insurance. But Republicans are preventing that plan from being shaped up.
    It’s much like they are saying “no” to Mr Obama in his all efforts to implement the plan.
    OK here I remember a pickup line ” Do you come here very often?”
    Next time if I come across a Conservative on Twitter,
    I will tweet him like this: “Do you say ‘no’ [to a Liberal] very often?” 😉

    So much thanks Lucy
    I’m always pleased to learn something new about this English.

  8. Myo ko ko says:

    Putting other things aside, I personally like this pickup line:
    “Where have you been hiding all my life?”
    I don’t see any “sexual sense” or “insult” in it.
    This line just means, as Lucy interprets it, that I’m glad I’ve finally found you.
    It is just beautiful itself and it’s considered as a pickup line just because it’s “too old to say,”
    just because many a guy have used it “too frequently.”

    After all, I owe Lucy many a thank for this post.
    Well, she is that smart as to be able to get some English out of this political conflict between
    Democrats and Republicans for us to learn.
    Thanks to her, I get to know that there has a “connection” between American politics and some
    pickup lines! 😉
    So Lucy, thanks for that.

    Myo ko ko

  9. Aécio Flávio Perim says:

    Lucy, sorry to say it, but you could change this news and bring us something better and more recent, maybe something from yesterday evening or from today morning. We are tired of reading this. Please have mercy on us.
    Aecio, from wonderland of Brazil. I love this land. I love you all.

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